Cocaine-Stuffed Bananas Ended Up At A Canadian Grocery Store… Eh?

by Mad Dog

CANADA — The nicest people on Earth just got a little bit peppier. That’s because according to grocers in British Columbia, a shipment of bananas they received was stuffed with grade-A cocaine.

Mama mia! That’s a crazy banana!

What did the police do?

Let’s just say that the British Columbian police were pretty pissed off about the situation.

The drug section of the Kelowna RCMP Street Enforcement Unit worked collaboratively with the Canada Border Service Agency (CBSA) to determine that these shipments originated in Colombia, Cpl. Jeff Carroll of the Kelowna RCMP Drug Section said in a statement. Our investigation leads us to believe these illicit drugs were not meant to end up in the Central Okanagan, and arrived here in the Okanagan Valley as a result of a missed pickup at some point along the way.”

Epic statement police! But you didn’t stop those bananas from coming in, did ya? Not so smart this time fellas.

What would have happened if the bananas weren’t discovered?

800,000 lucky Canadians would have gotten their first taste of sweet coca, the devil’s breath. In the meantime, I guess Canadians will have to resort to what they always do:

Freebase maple syrup out of a moose’s hoof. Now that’s what we’re talking about!

If you liked this cocaine story, check out this one about a man who got caught smuggling cocaine under his toupee!