CAR MANUAL, AMERICA — Okay, now this is just disgusting. We love cars as much as the next website, but we have a zero tolerance policy for vehicular sacrilege, and unfortunately, the image you are about to see is auto-blasphemy of the highest order. Anyone in the market for a 2020 Land Rover Defender may want to think again, because, according to some random person on the internet, the owner manual contains imagery that would make your mechanic blush through the soot and grease on their face.
You’ve been warned. Check it out below.
As you can see, the instructions for removing a deployable tow ball for a Land Rover’s most recent model brings to mind sexual thoughts that will ruin your day. If you’ve already contacted your nearest mechanic-priest and ask to be re-baptized in wiper fluid, we commend you.
For those of you who may not understand the problem with this image, it resembles an act of non-invasive intercourse, and ball-play. We’ve said enough. We’re disgusted.
Imagine it: you’re in your driveway. You need to remove the tow ball from your brand new car. You flip open the instruction manual, and in broad daylight, find yourself looking at what appears to be the centerfold of a collaboration between Hustler magazine and Auto Digest. Your next door neighbor, who is watering their lawn, sees what you’re looking at. They drop the hose, their jaw agape, and they scream. Later that night, you’re informed that you’ve been expelled from your Home Owner’s Association over charges of indecency and disturbing the peace.
This is shameful. Just shameful.
The graphic artist that designed this needs to have their hand chopped off and locked in a pillory. We are officially calling for your re-education, and will not being praying for his soul until he’s shown sufficient remorse. Let’s hope they are savagely punished soon!