25 Ridiculous Excuses People Gave For Cheating On Their Partners | Reasons So Stupid, You'd Rather Want None
It is indeed heart-wrenching to break up with someone you deeply felt for. Even though we eventually do, it is hard to move on in most cases. If you've offered a lot of love to your former partner but they ended up cheating on you, well, they are evidently...for a lack of a worse term, stupid. What makes them even more stupid is their excuse for cheating. Moving on from exes with such hilariously dumb excuses to cheat on you seems like nothing but a blessing in disguise. Reddit user u/Starboy3210 asks "People of Reddit, what is the dumbest reason your (ex) partner gave for cheating?" Here are some of the most ridiculously dumb excuses exes gave for cheating on their partner.
1. Yes. Stay alone...forever.
"'You didn't answer your phone, was I supposed to spend Saturday night alone??' I was at work, and so were you, we worked together you f*cking moron." -u/sixesand7s
2. No relapse.
"'You are dying! Do you really want me alone when you are dead?' I was fighting cancer, He also told me that I was disgusting and he felt gross touching me. Luckily, both types of cancer are out of my life." -u/Mr_BigDuck
3. "Object permanence isn't her strong suit huh?"
"My ex-girlfriend said i forgot you were alive. For details I wasn't in the military, I was in university." -u/Ali8ly
4. Didn't count?! Ex better do some math.
"It was his kids mom so it didn't count" -u/kittenxx96
5. Could've made up something better
"I had to prove to her I wasn't gay."-u/IDontEvenCareBear
6. Victim blaming be like...
"It's only cheating bc you found out, you made me into a cheater bc you found out."-u/IDontEvenCareBear
7. Why you gotta blame Santa?
"My serial cheater ex once told me while in a fit of tears. 'I can't stop cheating, I just have so many issues, my mom lied about Santa when I was a kid and it really f*cked me up. I don't think I can trust people because of it so I cheat." -u/pastelflorist
8. Cheating on a sandwich = cheating on human?
"It's like if you order the same subway sandwich for a year, eventually you're gonna get bored of it. But you try another flavour and when you go back to the original one it’s better than you remembered" Felt not so good being compared to a 6 inch BLT tbh." -u/NucularOrchid
9. Read all terms and conditions carefully
"'You never specifically said I wasn't allowed to sleep with [girl he had slept with before we were together]. I thought you meant I wasn't allowed to sleep with NEW people. ' This was well after a conversation we had had agreeing that we were monogamous and exclusive."-u/hveistuve
10. Reconsidering the idea of a romantic partner in...3...2...1.
"You can't have children anymore so I just slept with your friend to get pregnant. I was hoping that once you found out you'd stay with me and raise the kid - you're such a good dad." -u/Toxikfoxx
11. You're no longer invited
"He said it was my fault for not being at that party with him, even though I wasn't invited and he didn’t tell me he was going." -u/Mirrorflute88
12. Gonna dig you a hole
"And I quote "it's a woman's fault if a man cheats, so this is on you." -u/Cautious_Platform_40
13. Did you say 'drunk' or 'dumb'?
"They were 'so drunk' they 'forgot' they had a boyfriend." -u/Fast_Beyond5963
14. 'Am shooketh
"You're the one who said than you wanted me to get closer with your family." -u/Educational-Fish9157
15. It's a curse?
"'My dad cheated on my mom so it's a curse' after he told me how much he hated his dad for hurting his mother repeatedly." -u/MarsaliRose
16. Even Dora didn't explore this much
"I didn't view it as cheating in the moment, I was exploring a part of myself" -u/kkdds3
17. How long?
"'Long distance is really hard.' I lived an hour away." -u/Jimothy-Goldenface
18. Tit for tat
"I thought you were cheating, so I did." -u/capnsmartypantz
19. Doppelganger who?
"I only slept with her because she looks like you." -u/UrNTA-but_I_am
20. Hope you got the backup ready now
"I felt you didn’t love me so I was arranging a back up just incase" -u/STAR995
21. Come again...or don't.
"'It's none of your business.' She was packing for a trip. I even helped her pack... so surely she had some self awareness to what could happen. 'Why are you packing condoms?'" -u/spiderborland
22. What kind?
"I was trying to make friends." -u/SomedayWeDie
23. Maybe check that hippocampus
"She blamed it on her 'memory problems.' Funny how her memory only impacts her ability to be faithful and respect boundaries." -u/Old_Squirrel6567
24. "He spelled 'lucky to be rid of him' wrong."
"He did it to teach me what a great man he was and how desirable he was and I didn't realise how lucky I was to have him." -u/sageofbeige
25. Might have been the devil
"She told me an angel came to her in a dream and told her she would give birth to the messiah." -u/bludvic_the_cruel