Bride Is Trolled for ‘Don’t Save the Date’ Wedding Cards Plan | “She Might as Well Say Gifts Are Welcome, You Are Not”

There's a lot that goes into planning a dream wedding. Budget and time could act as limitations but most people want their near and dear ones around to witness the remarkable milestone of their life. A big part of it all is the 'Save the Date' wedding invites. In case you have a beef with any relative or friend, you might think of ways to not invite them to your big day. One bride suggested a rather harsh way of excluding guests from her wedding invitation on the internet and she was roasted hard for it.

A post shared on Reddit by u/Rough-Jury, titled, "Bride wants to send 'you're not invited to my wedding' messages with save the dates" had some fireworks blow up. The bride wrote, "How does one NICELY inform people they have not been invited to a wedding? I'm inviting only 14 family members to our September 2024 wedding (for multiple reasons but mainly because of cost and occupancy limit). I want an easy, polite, mass way to inform people they've not been invited and why. I was thinking I could include a note letter in the Engagement announcements or Save-The-Dates. Any ideas welcome." Sure, seeking advice before an important event is helpful but the internet might not always serve as the best place for that.
Many people were stunned to read this post and ridiculed the idea but also had some insight to offer. "The correct etiquette for this is to send out a wedding announcement AFTER the wedding,'' wrote u/Minimum_Reference_73. "Realistically none of us can invite everyone. If you elope or have a small wedding, announcement cards after can be a nice way of keeping in touch - as can just letting them know when and if you next talk to them after the wedding. If you don't talk to someone often enough after the wedding, there's no reason to single them out and tell them they don't make the cut!" suggested u/linerva. "I don’t understand why you even need to inform people that they are not invited. What’s the point unless you’re gift-grabbing, that would be the only reason. Definitely tacky and if I received an announcement telling me I wasn’t invited it would be going to file 13, friendship over," commented u/OkieLady1952.
"Imagine getting a 'Save the Date' in the mail with an attached note: 'But not really. You can make plans that day, you're not invited,'" said u/discordany. "She might as well say gifts are welcome. You are not," joked u/cherrycokelemon. "Your presents are wanted, your presence isn't," added u/wolfie379. But u/snowstormmongrel reasoned out, "I dunno, I could see why someone would want to do this. That way you don't have to deal with every. Single. Person. Asking you why they weren't invited and having to answer that every time." It's great if the bride wants to have a peaceful, low-cost wedding but it's best to not stir hard feelings with radical 'Don't Save The Date' notes.