Couple Wants Cat And Dog As 'Flower Girl' And 'Ring Bearer' But SIL Insists on Her Kids | "How Presumptuous"
One's own wedding is no doubt the most memorable day in any couple's life. They want to manage every nitty-gritty of the event—from planning to execution to dresses to guests—and that's how it should be. So when one bride-to-be wrote a post on Reddit's r/AmItheAsshole, asking if she's an AITA for having her cat and dog as 'flower girl' and 'ring bearer,' the community was a bit divided.
Traditionally, these roles are assigned to the children of the family. But the anonymous OP wanted to break the "conventional idea." The bride, u/IntrepidOffering on Reddit's online forum, explained that her sister-in-law opposed her decision. In fact, to get her way, the "presumptuous" SIL played the 'victim card.'
She wrote, "I'm getting married soon. My fiancé and I have been diving into wedding planning. I brought up the idea of having our dog Mika and our cat Tibby fill the roles of the 'flower girl' and 'ring bearer.'" The idea is undoubtedly unique and interesting. The anonymous woman added, "Understand, Mika and Tibby are like children to us."
For more context on why she's insisting on having the pets for this role on her wedding, she said, "They helped me through my deepest depression. I honestly think I wouldn't be here anymore if I didn't have to stick around to care for them." She added that her fiancé liked the idea, and they locked it.
But here's the catch. The idea of having pets for the role didn't fancy her sister-in-law. In fact, she caused drama regarding this decision only because she felt her 'rainbow kids' were entitled to the part. What kids, you may be wondering. The bride gave the background of all the fuss her SIL was creating.
Apparently, her brother and SIL had a series of incredibly painful miscarriages before they had her niece Ava and nephew Liam (4y/o twins) via IVF. As a result, her whole family created a 'big deal' of the twins, calling them 'rainbow babies.' The family also showers them with attention and affection, almost to the exclusion of the other grandkids, wrote the OP. How entitled.
Since the bride-to-be lives in another country, she hasn't been involved too much with this. But her SIL confronted her with, "Why she gave 'Ava and Liam's roles' to her animals." She insisted, it would be "good for the family" for the twins to be in the wedding and pushed her not to go "against the tradition."
So when the anonymous OP asked Reddit, some gave her a green signal and some disagreed. A Reddit user, u/Sad-Angle434, declared, "IMBTA for saying this, but those kids are "their" miracle babies. Not yours. Your furbabies are your babies, so NTA."
Another Redditor, u/Technical_Bobcat_871, echoed, "Agreed. It sounds like SIL wants to make OP's day about her miracle babies. She had her time; this is OP's wedding. And not an event to make people marvel at her kids." We second that.
Some Redditors said otherwise. A Reddit user, u/Skill3rwhale, opposed, "Me in my head: Logistically, this is near impossible unless you train and socialize the animals from birth to this [very] specific event." Another, u/adorablegadget, joked, "Lmao, this. Don't trust the cat with jewelry, please." Yes, but we totally disagree with the naysayers and are hooked to learn whether the 'flower girl' and the 'ring bearer' had a full blast as their parents got married.