Husband Writes His Stay-At-Home Wife a Performance Review on Her Parenting Style. It Quickly Blew up in His Face

We often show our partners how much we love them through simple acts of affection. Sometimes we appreciate their efforts through words of appreciation and sometimes we buy them gifts. However, there are some people out there whose love language is pretty offensive and strange.

What would you do if your partner decides to hand you a paper that outlines your performance as a stay-at-home wife and mother? Imagine taking care of your family out of love and necessity and your partner decides to ruin the harmony by listing out your strengths and weaknesses as a parent in fine detail. This is exactly what Reddit user u/Garrbie did and decided to ask the AITA subreddit about their opinion.

The man explained to the court of public opinion that “they have a six-year-old child together and his wife has another 13-year-old daughter who lives with them.”

“We also have custody of our 15-year-old niece. The teens are each other’s best friends. The dynamic here is pretty much mom and youngest against the teens, with me being the referee between everyone,” the 33-year-old Reddit user wrote.

“My wife has taught the youngest [that] she can blame others for her actions to avoid consequences. She just says the word, and one of the teens will get punished without question. There’s no doubt, she is my wife’s favorite. I love her, but she’s becoming nothing more than an entitled brat,” the man added. He also mentioned one instance when all three kids broke a house rule but only the teenagers were punished, sparing the 6-year-old.

This couple might need some serious counseling sessions as it appears that they have a communication gap which is pretty much-causing trouble in their family. But rather than seeking some expert’s help, the man decided to play "smart" and write down a review of his wife’s performance in the household. 

“We have had countless, tiring arguments. She’d either not see her faults, or we’d agree to do this and that, but it was never actually done,” he said, explaining that he had already tried everything else to tackle this problem. “I decided to write her a performance review, as a stay-at-home mother. Her areas in need of improvement, well it was a lot. She needs to be fair in all her decisions, and stop making rash decisions without taking all three kids into consideration. I recommended she give each child the same amount of one-on-one alone time to speak, or just be with one another."

As expected, his wife did not take this review well and there was no one to stop the incoming storm in his life. The wife was quiet for a while but then she exploded on her husband. “Then she said if we’re going to do this type [of] sh*t, she’ll get a private bank account and take half my paycheck every week. She further said the review was abusive, and a manipulative sexist move,” the man concluded, asking the community if he was wrong to write the review.

The community did not appreciate what u/Garrbie did and most of the comments were against his behavior but some of them thought that the person was right to do this. Perhaps it was his last-ditch effort to communicate with his wife. One person wrote: "Are you her employer? Because employers give performance reviews. Partners do not give performance reviews."

Another person surprisingly supported the man and wrote, "How many times does he have to bring it up to her? She dismisses it. Sounds like one person is doing the actual parenting and the other is letting the youngest run rampant."

We hope that this family can resolve their issues offline and be happy.