25 Unique Mom Catchphrases That Will Give Dad Jokes Tough Competition | “I’m Not Sleeping, I’m Just Resting My Eyes”

25 Unique Mom Catchphrases That Will Give Dad Jokes Tough Competition | “I’m Not Sleeping, I’m Just Resting My Eyes”
Cover Image Source: Reddit | u/hestirthebestir

If dads tickle our funny bones with dad jokes, then moms win the game of funny catchphrases. Moms excel at a variety of other things but this article is dedicated to the catchiest mum catchphrases which are as universal as they are unique. Every mom has her unique way of making chicken soup and saying her catchphrases. The funny mom phrases in this list come from a Reddit thread where u/franc_the_bikesexual asks "What is your mom's catchphrase?". Most of the funny phrases on the list deal with topics that we often stereotypically associate with mothers, such as feeding ever-hungry children, assisting everyone in the household in locating misplaced items and being ironic. So here are 25 of the most ironically hilarious catchphrases by our moms which you can relate to and laugh at. 


1. Lose my mind 

"Y'all gonna make me lose my mind up in here."
My mother could never resist quoting DMX when we were being bad. -u/fortheworkmtf

2. Believe me ... or don't 

"Listen to me now and believe me later." -u/LifeOfThePotty

3. My way is the highway

"English is my mom's second language, so instead of saying 'It's my way or the highway,' my mom says 'My way is the highway.'" -Reddit 

4. Dangerous 

"If you had any brains, you'd be dangerous." -u/boblablaugh

5. Not your friend 

"Yelling in a midwestern accent 'I'M NOT YOUR FRIEND I'M YOUR MOTHER!'" -u/hestirthebestir

6. Drink some water 

"'Are you drinking enough water?'
Headache? Drink more water. Upset stomach? Drink water. Bad grades? You need more water. Bone protruding from your knee? Drink some water, you'll be fine."-u/calinaxoxo

7. Ya'll

"She likes to say 'y'all' a lot even though she's a tiny Sri Lankan immigrant. It's my favorite thing." -u/Nimbus-Rose

8. Throw him 


9. Don't act your IQ

"Act your age, not your IQ." -u/PreceededSoup

10. Poisoned 

"'Wait! This bit's poisoned!'
Said every time she walked past me, while I was eating something; then promptly followed by her grabbing the "poisoned" bit of whatever I was eating and eating it herself. -u/vmlm

11. When you have it, you need it more

"Better to have it and not need it, than to need it and not have it." -u/billardfillmore

12. Resting my eyes 

"I'm not sleeping, I'm just resting my eyes." -u/Cayne912

13. Beat you with it 

"When looking for something mom told us to find, and we either legitimately couldn't find it, or we were being lazy: 'If I find it, I'm going to beat you with it.'
We had a good childhood, though." -u/IncompleteInsecure

14. No damn needed 

"God doesn't need a damn, he can walk on water." u/sociallyineptmilk

15. Cry about 

"Stop that crying or I'll give you something to cry about." -u/Buttowskie

16. Ragamuffin 

"You're not going anywhere with me looking like a ragamuffin." -u/fidgit17

17. Mom is always right 

"What do I always tell you?... Mom is always right." -Reddit

18. Facebook University 

"I saw it on The Facebook." -u/LL_Cool_Joey

19. Starve to death 

"I'd let you guys (me and my older brother) starve to death, but it would cost too much to bury you." -u/audioprod

20. Don't get hurt 

"Don't get hurt, 'cause we ain't going to the hospital!" -u/sweatersaus

21. Break the house 

"If I drop something or slam a cupboard while doing something she asked:
'I didn't say break the house!'" -Reddit 

22. Coupon 

"Oh, I have a coupon for that!" -u/AnnoyedFloyd1210

23. Can't have nice things 

"This is why we can't have nice things!" -u/ServoWHU42

24. Rest in pee 

"'Go now or forever rest in pee.' before any long car trip." -Reddit

25. Didn't ever

"Would've, could've, should've, didn't." -u/Ultravioletgray 

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 Mom catchphrases to fill your day with laughter