Marriage is a sacred union of two souls and a battleground for two clashing personalities. These tweets hilariously capture the highs and lows of marriage.
We have often heard the expression "bickering like a married couple." Getting married to the one we love may be a dream come true but in the longer run, sharing our life with a partner has its fair share of hurdles and happiness. And in the long run, bickering is pretty much inevitable.
To make the relationship work, however, couples mostly resolve their conflict, accept each other's quirks and focus on the sweet and hilariously memorable moments of the partnership. So, we have raked through Twitter to find the best tweets about the reality of being in a marital union which are brutally honest and hence, very relatable.
Get married so you can argue over who had a worse night sleep.
— Karen (@AntsyButterfly) September 22, 2022
One of the perks of marriage is having someone around to let you know which normal things from your childhood were actually very very weird
— Kristen Mulrooney (@missmulrooney) September 15, 2022
Why would I need a haunted house when I can just open the dishwasher and see how my husband arranged the dishes
— Maryfairyboberry🧚🏻♀️ (@maryfairybobrry) October 13, 2022
40% of my wife and I's conversations go like this:
— Dadman Walking (@dadmann_walking) October 4, 2022
me: what?
wife: i was talking to the dog
First came love. Then came marriage. Then came pic.twitter.com/45bQAM4ju2
— Jessie (@mommajessiec) October 9, 2022
Marriage is sometimes apologizing for stuff you did in your wife's dream
— Nostradadmus (@bigpoppadrunk) September 18, 2022
The way I’m complaining about being sick, you would think I’m the husband.
— Ousa Medusa (@MedusaOusa) September 25, 2022
Me: Is it weird that I-
— James Breakwell, Exploding Unicorn (@XplodingUnicorn) October 7, 2022
Wife: Yes.
Me: You didn't let me finish.
Wife: Everything you do is weird.
Marriage is telling your spouse you heard about a cool new restaurant on a Monday only for them to repeat to you on a Friday “there’s this cool new restaurant I just heard about”
— DonutHawk (@StruggleDisplay) October 13, 2022
How dare my husband interrupt the story I decided to tell in the middle of his story
— Mommeh Thee Dearest (@mommeh_dearest) September 29, 2022
Some couples exercise together.
— Dan Regan (@Social_Mime) October 7, 2022
My wife and I send each other articles when we're sitting in the same room.
My husband was not muted during his meeting this morning so they heard him apologize to the puppy for “paying the vet to chop off your testicles.”
— Eli McCann (@EliMcCann) September 22, 2022
I like to send love notes in my husband's lunch like SORRY THE BREAD IS STALE MAYBE YOU SHOULD LEARN TO SEAL IT BACK WHEN YOU ARE DONE
— Tracie Breaux (@traciebreaux) September 13, 2022
me, about to ask my wife about her day pic.twitter.com/J3ckyd9au8
— Uncle Duke (@UncleDuke1969) September 19, 2022
Husband: How’s your diet going?
— Jawbreaker (@sixfootcandy) September 27, 2022
Me: *sucking the jelly out of a doughnut with a straw and putting it back in the box so no one knows I did it*
Great!
Please take a moment out of your day to admire this pumpkin my wife carved. His name is Derp. pic.twitter.com/S7fVn8PUnV
— James Breakwell, Exploding Unicorn (@XplodingUnicorn) October 18, 2022
I tried to say something supportive to my husband but it only freaked him out
— Midge (@mxmclain) October 18, 2022
I came back from the grocery store with a bag of fresh vegetables and when my wife asked what I’d bought I said it was a bag full of good intentions
— Kevin The Dad (@kevinthedad) October 7, 2022
Therapist: have you found time for self care this week?Me: I ate the fries out of my husband’s order while driving home alone with dinner.Therapist: *nods approvingly*
— One Awkward Mom (@oneawkwardmom) September 18, 2022
When I'm mad at my husband, I go to target and spend money. When I'm really mad at my husband, I still go to target and spend money but I take his remote with me.
— Emma Beasley🐝 (@JustBeingEmma) October 20, 2022
I just asked my husband how much he loves me on a scale of one to ten and he said, without hesitation, “the usual. An 8.”??????????
— Eli McCann (@EliMcCann) September 24, 2022
My husband accused me of hiding the good snacks. They were in the snack cupboard. Where snacks live.
— I Hide From My Kids (@IHideFromMyKids) October 18, 2022
Marriage involves a lot more shouting “I’M IN THE BATHROOM” than I originally thought.
— Jessie (@mommajessiec) October 19, 2022
Pillow talk when you’re married in your 40s is whispering things like “when I die, if you need access to the accounts, just hold my phone up to my dead face”
— I Hide From My Kids (@IHideFromMyKids) October 5, 2022
this feels oddly similar to how i wound up married to my first wife pic.twitter.com/rec9hTmGXT
— Uncle Duke (@UncleDuke1969) October 16, 2022