Porn Viewership Skyrocketed In Florida After Tampa Bay’s Super Bowl Victory

by Mad Dog
jack off baby

FLORIDA—Easy now, boys! Porn viewership was bumping in Florida after the Buccaneers won their Super Bowl victory. According to a release from Stripchat, viewership on the site in Florida jumped 15% after Tom Brady earned his seventh ring.

Bow-Chicka-Bow-Wow! That’s almost too hot to handle.

How Did This Happen?

The Daily Caller offers no answers whatsoever. Those pussy-ass writers are too meek to wade into this territory. Not us, though. Mad Dog is wading in swinging. Get ready to have some knowledge dropped right on your lap, big daddies.

Let’s break it down for you, okay? This is exactly what happened:

During the Super Bowl, people were not watching porn. Then, after the Super Bowl ended, they immediately went back to watching porn. Seems pretty cut and dry to be honest. We love this for Florida. Good job, guys.

Did The Men’s Humor Writers Watch Porn During The Super Bowl?

Absolutely not. We never watch porn. In fact, we’ve never seen it on time in our goddamn lives. The only thing we watch is Sons Of Anarchy and we love it so much that we actually want to be characters in the show. Riding a motorcycle and acting tough is basically as sick as it gets. We dream about it all the time. Whenever we feel ourselves getting even slightly horned up, we turn on FX’s finest biker drama and kick back until the horniness dissipates. Just our little technique. Works like a charm, brother!

As always, keep grinding y’all! Let’s get this bread.

Like this porn viewership as related to the Bucs’ Super Bowl victory article? Check out dads who are winning fatherhood!

MensHumor.com