Burglar Finds Child Left In Stolen Car, Threatens To Call Police On Mother

by Gorman

BEAVERTON, OREGON — Being a parent is not easy, but it isn’t easy being a burglar either. This week a burglar stole a woman’s car, found a child inside and returned it. Just to clarify, the burglar returned the child, not the car. In fact, according to the Associated Press “once the thief realized the toddler was in the backseat, he drove back, berated the woman for leaving her child unattended, told the woman to take the child and drove away in the stolen vehicle.”

This guy’s got moxie!

The report describes the circumstances leading up to the theft. “The woman went into a grocery store about 15 feet (5 yards) from the car Saturday, leaving her 4-year-old child inside with the engine running and the vehicle unlocked.” If leaving your child unattended in a car for a few minutes means you’re a bad parent, well this country is FULL OF EM.

Burglars Aren’t Babysitters

To be clear, it was absolutely, positively a terrible idea to leave her child in the car. Leaving the car while it was running and unlocked was not the brightest idea, either. The genius of the year award is not going to this woman. But it’s possible she didn’t think she’d be in there that long. She could see her car from the store. Also, it can be stressful running errands with a child in tow.

Also, THE GUY STOLE HER CAR. Amazing the hubris of those in the wrong! It’s pretty hilarious that he threatened to call the cops, though. Oh, to be a fly on the wall of the 911 switchboard for that dispatch.

The stolen car was found a few miles away, but the thief is still on the loose. Hopefully he’s grifting and lecturing other people into being better parents. God know criminals like him are exactly what the world needs right now.

Want more tales of the trials and tribulations of being a parent during these challenging times? Click here!